Dating Violence

Dating violence is a pattern of controlling, abusive and aggressive behavior in a romantic relationship. It can happen in straight or gay relationships. It can include verbal, emotional, physical or sexual abuse, or any combination thereof. You may experience dating violence even if you are not being physically abused. It can occur in both casual dating situations and serious, long-term relationships.

Dating violence can happen to anyone, at any age. Being a victim of dating violence is not your fault. Nothing you say, wear or do gives anyone the right to hurt you.

Facts

• One in three teenagers has experienced violence in a dating relationship.
• 50-80% of teens reported knowing someone who was involved in a violent relationship.
• Young women, ages 16-24, experience the highest rates of relationship violence.
• Of the women between the ages of 15-19 murdered each year, 30% are killed by their husband or boyfriend.¹

Signs of an abusive relationship

• Not letting you hang out with your friends
• Calling or paging you frequently to find out where you are, who you’re with and what your doing
• Telling you what clothes and makeup to wear
• Having to be with you all the time

• Calling you names, belittling you
• Threatening to hurt you or someone you care about
• Jealousy

• Shoving
• Punching/Hitting
• Slapping
• Pinching
• Kicking
• Hair pulling
• Strangling

• Unwanted touching
• Forcing you to have sex
• Not letting you take your birth control
• Forcing you to perform other sexual acts

Get Help

If you think you are in an abusive relationship

• Talk to someone you trust
• Call 911 for emergencies
• Call a 24 hour hotline
• Mercer County Hotline - 609-394-9000
• New Jersey Statewide Hotline - 1-800-572-SAFE
• National Domestic Violence Hotline – 1-800-799-SAFE
• If you know someone who is in a violent relationship, you can call a hotline for information and encourage them to seek help

References

1. City of New York, Teen relationship Abuse Fact Sheet, March 1998